Down To Borrowed Light
by blackindiaink
Summary: Alice has developed feelings that shake her confidence. Set in New Moon after Bella's disastrous birthday party. Alice and Jasper go to Alaska not knowing that Edward and the others are soon to follow. Alice has a surprising vision.
1. Oceanus Procellarum

Author Notes: Alice/Bella

I decided to try my had at a Twilight fic. I hope it entertains.

Feedback of any kind is more than welcome of course.

I am unlucky enough to have not had a dream... so I don't own any of this. Thanks Stephanie.

* * *

Light, blue like an ocean, covered the statue still body lightly leaning against the left side of the floor to ceiling window. The frame of the window had been carelessly pushed all the way to its most open position. In fact, it was straining against its metal retainers as if it was about to fall off into the clear, crisp night. The below zero temperatures were of no concern and the statue had not moved in as many hours as it took to trek from Anchorage to Denali, which would be quite awhile for a human on foot. Her arms were crossed making her slight shadow seem more angular. This, combined with the spiky shadows her hair sent in all directions made her seem as razor sharp as the cold air. Tonight the sky was completely clear and a large moon spilled its borrowed wealth throughout the landscape allowing for the complete, almost daytime like, illumination of the world for those with more than human sight. The soft bulges of the snow covered ground contrasted with the sharp lines of the trees, which was a wonderful thing to concentrate on if you were not safe inside your own mind. Alice had been safe and sure of herself until she had met a very special human.

Her extra sensory abilities had afforded her a sense of confidence that she had become dependent upon and formed a cornerstone of her personality. She had lived the last 80 or so years with little real disturbances but now something had changed internally, which was amusing since her outward appearance would never shift. She would never age, her hair would never grow, her physical fitness would never dip below the height it now stood at, and she would never know a natural death. These facts had never seemed overly important until they were displayed within her mind in ever apparent contrast to the different course that her silent heart had now taken her on. The frozen world stared back at her as if mocking her inner turmoil. Let it, she deserved the joke the world had played on her. Her carelessness was painfully clear and when she compared her behavior to Edward's ever careful ways she realized that she was to blame. If only she had been a little more careful with her situation she would not be faced with this frozen future.

Actually, the events of Bella's birthday had probably been more helpful to her in the long run than anything else. She was here with Jasper and Bella was in Forks with Edward. This is how it should be. The memories of the black hunger that had overtaken her mate at the sight of Bella's warm blood would stay with her for some time. She was thankful that she had been close enough to block the attack, which gave her some small comfort. The hurt incurred by Jasper's bite was so small in comparison to knowing that her body would be protecting Bella from a far worse fate than she knew. After she had rushed Bella away there was a moment when her mouth almost betrayed her. She had almost related her complete need for Bella right then and there. It was bad enough that she was still clutching the terrified girl to her cold frame like she was the most precious thing in her life. The whispers that threatened to flow from her mouth to Bella's ear were dangerous indications of her own dwindling control. Having Bella so close to her after such a potentially life threatening event was not a good idea and yet she kept Bella held close to her afraid to let go. Bella seemed more than happy to stay where she was while she recovered but Alice became uncomfortable with the smell of Bella's blood in the air and she could sense the paper cut still oozing so she had reluctantly pried herself from Bella and waited for Edward's eventual approach.

She wasn't good at filtering her speech. She had never been more aware of this fact then when she had discovered a growing seed of feelings for her brother's new love interest. Now that she could not speak freely she felt hobbled to the monotonous pleasantries that small talk provided. This was not true of all cases but she had become very careful to make Bella speak more than she herself talked. This was a hard task considering that she was far more verbose than Bella had ever been. Making Bella talk also had the added delight of the knowledge that she had gained from the interaction. The downside to this was that she become more enchanted with each exchange making it harder to smother the now blossoming feelings that had worked their way into her social consciousness. In this one case Jasper's lack of fully established control had worked in their favor. She was removed from the direct influence of Bella's various charms and Bella and the rest of the family were removed from the possibility of an immensely awkward and possibly destructive situation.

Hours after Edward had taken Bella safely away from the Cullen residence Alice had begun to feverishly pack her things. She was joined halfway through her task by Jasper and his somewhat slower pace still made him ready faster than Alice was. He didn't have to ask what they were doing or where they were going. He had embarrassed himself by slipping and even though he never doubted his family's love the code that they lived by was very important to the core of their bond so he knew that they had to go, at least for a time. He gently probed Alice's feelings for a sign of the amount of damage he had done, and picked up on everything he expected. She was feeling guilt, concern, anxiousness, heartsick and a large amount of shame. He was, however, slightly puzzled by the amount of these feelings that she was directing internally. She was not in any way to blame for his breach of control, though knowing Alice she would feel guilty for not seeing the incident in advance and thus not being able to prevent it. They did not have time to converse about what he had picked up and he had no need to rehash the events so soon after they had happened so he let it go and ran their bags to the jeep. They would need it for where they were going.

As soon as they had arrived at their destination in Alaska Jasper had taken to the woods. He was in very great need of a through hunt and half expected Alice to want to accompany him. He would have declined her company even if she had suggested it but he was surprised that she had not mentioned it at all and had instead taken her current position as soon as she was inside the room. The view that their bedroom afforded seemed perfect for her needs and Jasper left her there feeling her swirling emotional state with every step his harried feet took in the direction of his prey. So many hours later when he returned to the large house that the Cullen's had built near the national park. He found his wife in the same condition he had left her. The night embraced her and she seemed to be finding comfort in it so he left her to find some solace of his own. He would stay nearby and feel the vibrations that her breathing created in the air by concentrating on the exact moment she needlessly inhaled and exhaled. They had experienced a great deal of life in their time and with that came confidence in the wisdom you had gained. He counted himself a very lucky man to have been captured by Alice's pull and he had been a student of her every move over the years. He knew it would do no good to pull her attention toward him in her current state. Even if he were hurting he would never cause Alice needless concern. He would sort himself out in time, though it might take awhile to work through this setback. After all, his pride had been wounded.

Alice let Jasper's presence sink to the edge of her awareness and once again concentrated on the outside world. She could not take comfort in his arms because it was so wholly unfair to him. He needed that from her now and she did not have the heart to receive comfort for her heartache in return. She would not feed the beast that she had made of herself with one more emotional betrayal especially since he had no way of being aware of it. She didn't know how long she could resist the relief that awaited her in his embrace but she would hold out for as long as she could bear. They would talk eventually but now was a time for stillness and cool light. Afterward, she would forgive herself and hope that her family would be reunited. She had no place to speak to what Bella needed but her feeling that she could fill her needs better than anyone would not recede for the moment. They were winning and she could see no way out.

* * *

Bella had accepted Alice's letter from Edward with confusion marked on her face. Now it was the only proof that she had left that the Cullen's had existed in the first place. She clutched it to her body as if she wanted it to become a part of her. There was nothing left of her love except her quickly fading memories and the hole in her chest. She had tried to understand when Alice and Jasper had left, but she still felt incredibly guilty. She never wanted to be the cause of any kind of pain for anyone, but especially the family that she had come to think of as her own. Edward's departure had completed the demolition of her soul that Alice had began. She had lost her best friend and the center of her orbit in close succession and now she was facing the consequences. It was a moment to moment feeling of collapsible pain. Each wave cascaded into another until she thought she had bottomed out but it started anew again when any stimuli presented itself along with a memory of what she had lost. The whisper of her curtain reminded her of Edward's and Alice's preferred method of entrance to her room. If she so much as heard music the edges of her wound would throb with the memory of Edward's complicated melodies. Whenever she saw her reflection in the mirror she saw herself deteriorating little by little. She would silently wonder if there was a limit to how far she would slide down the abyss she had entered. Would she eventually just die of barely existing? These things and many others related flowed through her all day until she lay her body down to a rest that would not come. Her nightmares of the mist filled forest and her ever escaping needs prevented her from enjoying any restitution to her body or mind. So she walked around as the living wounded a little of her will to live seeping through the bandaged hole in her chest with every breath. Just the rise and fall of her chest was painful and she desperately wished to live in the past and eradicate the present conditions from her thoughts. When she tried to imagine the feeling of being in Edward's arms she could feel the exact memory escaping her. At the rate she was going her ill equipped human brain would cause her to forget what Edward looked like. She could feel the fuzziness around the edges. With months of absence came the haze that began to slowly cover the root of her memory. Occasionally, she let her mind wander to Alice and she could pretend that she felt Alice searching her visions for traces of her, but she would not allow the indulgence for long. She had been the cause of Alice's departure and her clumsiness was the reason she would never see the two most beautiful sights she had ever encountered again. She rose from her bed to begin the day once more. It was practically the same experience over and over by now. She dressed for school and took heart in the fact that none of her friends would bother to distract her from her complete surrender to the feeling of absence.

School was like reading the back of a shampoo bottle, rinse and repeat. It rarely changed and she was able to glide through gaining enough of a feeling for things to just pass by. At lunch she sat silent and pale hovering above her large bowl whose bottom was barely covered by the food she had placed in it. Occasionally, she nibbled at a carrot if anyone looked her way. Everyone's concern with how skinny she was getting had made her learn early on to always appear to be eating something when possible. At least it stopped them from saying anything now. Angela still gamely tried to include her in the conversation and goings on of the group, but everyone else had become somewhat disdainful or immune to her lack of interest in anything. Mike seemed to be waiting for her to snap out of it so he could have his chance to woo her again. He looked for opportunities to distract her from her loss on occasion but mostly he sat by waiting for her to notice him.

The day she had allowed herself to look at the table that the Cullen's had been sitting at the first day she had become aware of them she had nearly collapsed with fresh pain and that was the first time she had unconsciously wrapped her arms around her torso as if to hold herself together. It would become a trend over in the months to follow. Her behavior had concerned the others and she was promptly escorted to the school nurse by the ever helpful Mike. She had insisted she was okay and had returned to class ignoring the skeptical looks that had been thrown her way by both Mike and Mrs. Abernathy.

Charlie was growing worried enough to consult his ex-wife about the condition of their daughter and as much as he enjoyed having her with him he was about to make a decision to send her to her mother when salvation arrived in the form of Jacob Black.


	2. Mare Crisium

Author's notes:

Thank you for the feedback. It is most appreciated. I am glad you are all enjoying it.

I am naming each of these chapters after a sea on the moon and each name in Latin represents what I feel this chapter is about. If I run out of seas I suppose I will have to come up with something else. Ha... anyway enjoy.

* * *

The air made quick work of mussing Bella's hair but the feeling was fantastic. She whipped towards her destination feeling the rain fall with her though it was all happening so quick. Soon she felt the fall coming to an end and the look of wonder on her face fell away to reveal true shock as the water hit her body. She entered the sea at an angle and but there was no pain. She simply let herself sink. It didn't feel real. She knew that she couldn't breathe but it felt like she should, as if the water would become air for her. The blank darkness held her weightlessness in the decreased gravity. Instead of falling hard and fast as she had been moments before she was floating through the heavy water the difference in velocity was comforting. Then the riptide caught her and she was the prize in a game of tug of war that the dark sea was playing with itself. The high of the jump was pulsing through her and she could practically hear the neurons firing in her brain telling her to find the air her lungs desperately needed. The exquisite pull of the water was too much and she could not tell which way was up. Then the voice pierced her consciousness. She had been hallucinating Edward's voice for awhile now but this was different. This was not what she had sought out with all this danger. She heard it faintly at first but then it grew in intensity until in one blow it pierced through her mind like a shot being fired.

"Bella... no!" the voice screamed in a rush of astonished pain.

It was not Edward's voice. Bella had little time to wonder at the change because she slipped into an unconscious state. A sigh escaped her lips creating bubbles with the very last of the air in her lungs. They flitted to the stormy surface and were swallowed again by the water.

* * *

Alice had been angry when Edward had arrived. Part of the reason that she had felt comfortable leaving Forks was that she was leaving him with Bella. She expected him to take care of her in a way that she could not, but he was here now and for a reason that she could not deny that she herself had used, at least partially. Bella might have been safer if she had never met the Cullen's but Alice's visions made her believe in a certain amount of fate and Edward was messing with that. She felt as if nothing would make this be the right decision, good intentions aside. She wanted to scream at him that she would have stayed were she in his position and that she had cleared the way for him to do just that by leaving. The unfair way that life had sorted them in was leading Alice to her last string of faith.

Jasper was still keeping a bit of distance and hunting more than usual. The changes that he was seeing in Alice were still puzzling and he had no idea why she was so angry whenever Edward was near. All of the Cullens were now back together again and everyone was aware of the tension but no one mentioned it, not for lack of trying in some quarters. Emmett, ever the fan of the direct approach, had suggested on several occasions in Jasper's prescience that he just ask the basic questions that might relieve the emotions that were haunting Alice, but Jasper stood fast to his approach of letting her come to him. He was a bit afraid that he didn't want to know what was going on with her. The possibilities that he had come up with based on who and what he thought were causing the unusual emotions in her were a bit unsettling. Maybe he was worried for nothing but everything seemed to be heading to a place of uncertainty.

Edward had left soon after his arrival. After a few blotched attempts at asking Alice if she had seen anything in the future having to do with Bella he had given up. He could gain nothing from reading her thoughts or asking straight out. She was blocking him and he didn't have the strength to deal with this on top of his sense of loss. His restlessness was palatable and everyone could tell that he would go insane if he stayed in one place much longer. So he set out on his own hunt but his was not for food. It was for a physical manifestation of what had taken him away from Bella. Logically, he knew it had been his decision but he needed something material to concentrate on so he sought out Victoria. He could at least clean up one mess that he had left behind.

It was a very short day and what light there had been dwindled as the minutes passed. Alice was propped between the wall and the window, resting with a book on her lap. It was a favorite of hers and she often turned to it when she was feeling less than herself. The problem with reading Sense and Sensibility at the moment turned out to be the entire plot. It was about love, lost and found. She had gotten to the part where Marianne climbs to the top of a hill to see Willoughby's house when she had simply stopped reading. Like Marianne, she could not vanquish these needs. Bella's blood sang for Edward but for Alice it played an entire symphony. It had not been this intense until she had left. She burned and the only way she could think of it was to remember how the others described the burning that the venom had caused in their bodies. She did not remember the experience herself but she believed it to be similar to the feelings that Bella's absence evoked in her. Thinking of the way light caressed Bella's face like it was made to be displayed as art or the way that her careless manner of dress made Bella look even more delicious than if she were in a ball gown. These are the thoughts that were inspired by the romantic musings of Austen. The dark loss of love that was present in the novel was slightly off though because Alice had never had Bella's love and she would never have it. The wound was therefore created by the unrequited nature of what she was experiencing. It made everything that much more thorny. She could never tell anyone of her desires and she had to make sure not to betray herself to anyone by accident. Now that Edward was gone it would be easier but with Jasper in the house she was far from safe. He already suspected something, which is why she was not surprised when a vision of him approaching her to ask about her moodiness came to her early that morning. She did not see what the result of the talk would be. It was odd to be blind in that way, but the vision had seemed to cut off in mid sentence.

She felt Jasper's approach right on time. She didn't turn to face him but waited for him to start his questioning. As soon as he uttered the first words she would be unsure of the next events.

"Alice, I need to ask..."

That was when the piercing feeling of cold like she had never felt blasted through her, making her fall from her balanced position to the floor. Then she was gone to a world of black water and a feeling of peace. She tried to look around but could see nothing. She felt herself being pulled back and forth by the water's will and tried not to struggle. An odd sensation wracked her chest and she realized that it was lack of air. She had no memory of actually relying on oxygen to survive so it was foreign to her. It was like a vision but it was also something entirely new. It was as if she were seeing it as it was happening instead of seeing what would be. She felt a familiar presence and knew that it was Bella. The humanity surrounded her and she was drawn further into the vision. She felt the weightlessness but then it hit her that this was not right. Bella was drowning.. and that is when she started to scream as loud as she could for Bella to live.

Jasper was at her side trying to pull her out of the crumpled mass that she had fallen into on the floor. He had never seen her like this and the fact that she was shouting Bella's name over and over made him more alarmed. Alice started flailing on the floor and was slowly moving toward the wall as if she sought something there. Finally in one shuttering gasp she collapsed against the wall, her face closed to him. She reached for the window but misjudged the distance for the first time since she had become a vampire. Her hand went right through the window shattering it. Then Carlile was there grabbing her before she fell out and into the frozen world. He steadied her from the left and Jasper took the other side. They moved her to the bed together and Jasper keeled down in front of her. He placed his hands on her face and willed her to open her eyes. When she finally did he saw it written there. She was in agony and it wasn't over him.

"I have to go," she whispered.

His face turned to an iron cast and he curtly nodded. He felt her desperation and he also knew that she would not explain. He looked at Carlile who looked back at him speculatively. How would he explain to the rest of the family when he didn't really know the exact reasons himself. He felt his hands grasp air and looked to where Alice's face had been, there was now nothing but emptiness. He slowly brought his hands together and raised himself to his feet. He watched her race around the room collecting a few things. When she finally stopped at the door she looked back and found his troubled eyes.

"Please, don't follow me," she pleaded.

He nodded once again and she knew that he would do as she asked. She knew he understood that this journey would be her's alone. She smiled brokenly at Carlile and took one last glance at Jasper then flew from the house and towards the horror that she feared awaited her back in Forks.

* * *

Sound formed graceful loops and waves around Bella. She found comfort in the wind and the rain that was caressing her body on its way through the woods. She remembered Jake's warm arms after he had pulled her from the surf but it was distant now. The progress that she had made in becoming alive again was not apparent anymore. After she had returned home she could still feel the sound of Alice's voice reverberating in her mind at a hundred and twenty decibels. The sound was so close that it was unlike the Edward hallucinations that she had been having. She now realized how off her mind had been when manufacturing those sounds. The true sound of Alice in her mind was so much sweeter and it made her wound throb and collapse in on itself repeatedly. She was vaguely aware that it was about time for Charlie to come home but the sense of duty that had given her the strength to act was gone. She had been out in these woods for hours just laying in the rain. She wished that the water would just fill her up but it smacked uselessly into her skin and rolled to the ground where it soaked the moss. Rain was once something she had hated but now she wanted it to take possession of her and let her flow away with it into the ground so she could rest there with the earth. Her breath came in shallow gasps and stopped for a few seconds when the sound of Alice's clear tortured words whipped into her again like the tide had. She felt like it would make an impression on her body that would be a permanent display of what had happened under the sea. She slipped into a dreamy state no longer affected by the cold, but listening to Alice call her name. The rhythm of the rain was sending her under once again.

As soon as Alice had made it to Forks she had ran into the Swan's front yard at human speed just in case anyone could see her She noticed that Charlie was not home and that Bella's truck sat where it always did. She had no idea if Bella was alive or dead at this point but she was betting on dead and desperately hoping for alive. She had been able to glean nothing else about Bella's fate from any visions. Everything just came out gray and blurry. She had known that she would not have the patience to drive the sometimes round about route back to Forks so she had ran the most direct route back not stopping for anything but to make sure that she had not been seen at the border. Still, she was probably too late. Bella's faint scent surrounded her now and it was hard to concentrate. It was a heady experience to be inundated with the aroma left around the house after being away from it for so long. She ran to the back of the house checking for any humans nearby before she climbed up the side griping the wood where it created small handholds. She reached Bella's closed window and peered inside. She saw nothing and having no qualms at this point about propriety she pulled the screen off and shoved the window up. Then she was in Bella's room. She was breathing steadily but had to stop to get a grip on herself. When she opened her eyes again they were blacker than the water that had surrounded Bella in her vision. She glanced over the room and when she felt steadier took one more deep smell. Bella had not been here in hours. She turned to the window and jumped back down. She followed the scent desperately seeking the most recent trail. She walked to the right of the house and into the woods following what she was almost sure was the right direction. As she ran the rain made it harder for her to distinguish scents but she gripped her memories of Bella inside her mind and kept up her pace. Then she sensed it. She was near what she had was looking for. She knew now that Bella's body did not lay on a beach somewhere but in these woods. She stopped, gathering her mind and then with a burst of speed found the clearing. The first thing she saw was jean clad legs sticking up at an odd angle from the earth and then the pale skin of Bella's stomach under her raised shirt came into view and she stopped releasing her dead heart to soar at the sight. Her chest was rising and falling. She seemed to simply be asleep. Alice knelt beside Bella her eyes roaming over the face she had longed to see. She reached out her hand to touch the pale cheek that was turned toward her needing reassurance that she was not seeing things.

Bella awoke startled at the coldness that was touching her. It felt familiar. She jerked toward the feeling and opened her eyes to see a face that she thought that she would never see again. Alice looked down on her with such wonder that her mind shut down and her heart nearly stopped. Her hand found the source of the cold and surrounded it with the warmth of her own hand. She clasped Alice's hand to her face before a choked sob escaped her and she turned to launch herself at the body sitting still above her.

"Oh, Bella"

This was all she heard and it was then that she knew for sure that Alice's voice had been no hallucination. Alice pulled Bella into her arms and rose carrying her as if she weighed no more than a leaf. Her ever graceful steps took them in the direction of the house. Bella noticed the dirt and grime coating Alice's clothes and wondered vaguely what had happened before she just let herself enjoy Alice's closeness. A phrase swirled in her mind until she felt it come to the surface. It was true, she thought.

"You came back."

Alice's face came to rest closer to Bella's in answer. She buried her nose in Bella's hair and inhaled. Love then hit her with inhuman force. She would worry about the rest later.


	3. Mare Nectaris

**Author's Note:**

**You guys have been great. Keep the feedback coming. I always like to hear what you like and don't like about my stories. **

**Seri85: I hope that this one leaves you a little more lighthearted. ;-D**

**If anyone is ever confused about a reference I make please feel free to ask. I know not everyone is a Jane Austen freak like me. **

**For those of you who don't know a black card is a very exclusive credit card whose actual name is the American Express Centurion Card. You basically pay through the nose to even possess one of these things. HA! I can't imagine being required to spend a quarter of a million dollars a year to have a credit card but I am sure Alice would not mind. **

* * *

The sun peeked through the round, wet clouds outside illuminating the floor where the last rays of the day splayed through the open window painting the room with a pink glow. Bella lay on her bed passed out from her strenuous afternoon. She had fallen asleep in Alice's arms on the way back to the house, which had made it a bit more difficult to get in through the window so they had tried the front door. Fortunately, Bella had left it open. For once it was a dreamless sleep that settled like a heavy blanket over her body. They made it into Bella's room and now Alice sat facing the bed with her legs pulled to her chest. Her arm was propped on her knees and extended toward the bed. Inside her cold grasp sat Bella's hand, her fingers gripping the small, pale ones tightly. Charlie had come home some time ago and Alice had hid in the closet when he had come looking for Bella. When he had been satisfied that his daughter was accounted for he left and Alice returned to her previous position. Bella had seemed to sense her returned presence and her hand opened and closed around thin air until Alice took it into her own again. The action made her sigh and she had scooted closer to the edge of the bed. The pink light gracing Bella's face made Alice fill with contentment. She listened to the sounds of Charlie microwaving dinner downstairs and chuckled to herself when he firmly planted his butt on the sofa in front of the television. Since he would obviously be there for the long haul she returned to thinking of the many ways that Bella's beauty touched her. She now fully understood the fascination with watching humans sleep or maybe it was only this particular person that could inspire these feelings. She would have to find out someday. For now, it seemed as if her sleeping beauty was waking.

Bella's lids slid slowly up until she was staring groggily into Alice's face. A lazy grin spread across the vampire's visage and Bella's lips responded in kind. She was so happy that it had not been a dream and she found that she could not look away especially since Alice's face was sparkling in the pink light. She took in the combination of of color and reflectiveness with wonder. Alice did not notice what drew Bella's stare. She was just happy that the girl was finally awake.

"I thought you were going to sleep forever," Alice said.

"You... are just impatient," she replied after a moment.

She started to stretch her arms but found that she was still clasping Alice's hand. She looked down, slightly embarrassed but was comforted when Alice didn't let go immediately. After a moment of close observation Alice finally did let go allowing Bella to find a more comfortable position. She looked down and blushed when she noticed that she was definitely not wearing the clothes she had been in earlier. She realized that Alice must have changed her out of them and into the shirt and shorts that she now wore. Her eyes surveyed Alice straight on again and she registered the grime coated state of her clothes and parts of her body. Alice noticed what she was looking at and glanced down herself. She had washed off some of the dirt in the sink and had placed a clean brown towel under herself so she would not make a stain on the floor but she still looked entirely covered with dirt. Bella reached out and pulled a twig from Alice's spiky hair. She looked at it for a moment before thinking fondly of how Alice was taking care of her once again. How would she ever repay the kindness. Then the fact that Alice had changed her clothes came off the back burner of her mind with a sizzle.

"Did you change me," she asked?

She knew the answer obviously but she had been compelled to visit the subject. Alice nodded solemnly before bursting into a wide grin again.

"You were very out of it so what else was there for me to do. I knew you would catch cold if you stayed in those soaked things." She paused wondering why Bella didn't seem to be able to look her in the eye. "I'm sorry if it offended you."

She leaned forward when a blush erupted on Bella's face again and continued in a semi-teasing tone.

"I promise I closed my eyes at the good parts."

This made Bella go even redder. "No.. it's fine," she finally stammered out blinking rapidly.

The thought of Alice seeing her imperfect human body was enough to send her mind out of the universe. How would her body compare to the beautiful stone skin of a vampire. As Bella remained silent Alice started to worry.

"Bella, it really is fine. I promise," she reiterated.

This seemed to relax Bella so Alice retracted her hand that she had unknowingly extended when she had started to feel awkward. Now the two sat in a strange silence not knowing where to go next. Finally, Bella remembered Charlie.

"Is Charlie home," she asked somewhat alarmed.

Alice nodded, "He came home awhile ago but he only looked in on you. Don't worry, I hid in the closet. I think I might have gotten some mud on your clothes though. You really should have a bigger closet." She had also noticed the lack of proper shoes while she was in there. There was a remedy for that and it was called a black card.

Bella looked toward the small space in question and frowned.

"I'm sorry you had to hide in the closet."

She could care less if Alice got mud on her clothes. The fact remained that part of her family had returned. Now the natural question occurred to her and she considered how to approach the subject. She could only figure one way, the direct route.

"Alice why are you back?"

Alice's face hardened slightly.

"Why did you jump?"

The question answered Bella's for her. The obvious conclusion was that Alice had seen her poor attempt at a high dive in a vision. She looked away from Alice for a moment thinking of a way to answer correctly. Before she could she heard a noise that she couldn't name come from Alice. Then she was pulled into the muddy arms of her favorite female vampire.

"Bella, how could you.."

Alice stopped speaking at the thought of loosing Bella to the whirling waves that she had experienced second hand in her mind. Her nose found the crook of Bella's neck and rested there not caring if her display of affection might seem out of place. Their interaction often defied the strict boundaries given to most friendships even if they hadn't stopped to think about that aspect so it was not that abnormal. Tears escaped Bella's eyes and fell to Alice's back where they were absorbed by the dried mud. Long dead emotions uncoiled inside her and she started to cry in deep, racking sobs. The dirt was reanimated where the tears fell in a stream and she finally pulled back from Alice gently. Her hand wiped self consciously at her nose.

"I wasn't trying to kill myself she said with certain finality. I just wanted to know what it would be like. I saw some guys diving earlier today and I... I just wanted to do it.

Alice nodded almost imperceptibly. She knew that there were other reasons behind Bella's jump but she believed that she had not been trying to kill herself. However ill thought out the action was she trusted the tone of Bella's confession.

"You're all dirty," Bella pointed out. She touched Alice's arm where a spot of dirt had stubbornly dried. Alice's hand flew to her hair and she sighed.

"Yeah, running long distances does tend to do that to a girl. I met more than a few rivers on the way."

She picked at her ruined shirt. "I will never be able to wear this again."

Bella smiled,"You wouldn't have anyway."

Alice reached out and flicked Bella lightly careful to put no strength behind it. "Who told you that."

When Bella just grinned back at her, she knew who the culprit was. When she registered the state of Bella's face the grin was gone. It had been replaced with pain and confusion. She started to reach out but stopped. She cursed herself for letting the conversation go there.

Bella waited for the throb to return to her chest. She held her breath and closed her mind in anticipation. Then she let the air out in one gasp when the pain didn't come like she thought it would. She tried to pull Edward's face into her mind but could not and the vagueness of her reaction caused her to pause longer still.

Alice was busy deciding if she should apologize and acknowledge what had passed or if she should just not speak until Bella did. She didn't know if she could take seeing Bella in pain over her brother when all she wanted was to scoop Bella into her arms again and keep her close.

Finally, Bella moved again. Her eyes found Alice's and she regained her grip on the present.

"You should get cleaned up," she stated. She glanced at the clock. "Charlie will be in bed soon and he won't even notice. He has to go in early tomorrow and besides when he's asleep he won't wake up for anything."

Alice shook her head in protest. "I should go elsewhere."

Bella panicked slightly at the thought of letting Alice get too far away from her. She couldn't risk her disappearing again. Alice started to get up but Bella reached out and pressed her hand to Alice's shoulder.

"No, it will be fine. Charlie will just think that it's me in there." She did not care if desperation colored her voice. She would do whatever it took to get Alice to stay.

Alice could not refuse when she was assaulted with Bella's pleading face. In truth she would have found it extremely difficult to leave Bella and so she agreed.

"I'll have to borrow some of your clothes." She looked at the closet door. "Preferably, not the ones I got mud on earlier."

She smiled down again and Bella visibly relaxed.

"Of course, whatever you need."

Alice tensed as she heard the lack of sound signaling that the television had been turned off. She looked to the door and Bella followed her gaze. Charlie ascended the steps slowly and when he reached the top he paused near Bella's door listening. Alice stood completely still prepared to hide if Charlie decided to enter the room. Bella did her best but could not attain the perfect stillness that Alice did. She watched Alice's face for signs of what would happen. Then Charlie's footsteps sounded reassuringly in the opposite direction of Bella's room. They grinned at each other and Alice silently settled back down on the floor to wait until it was safe for her to make her way to the bathroom.

"That was close," Alice whispered musically.

Thirty minutes later Bella sent Alice off to the shower with a set of fresh clothes and a promise to stay put in case Charlie decided to investigate. Now that she was alone she let herself probe confusing tangle that was her feelings. Alice had never really answered her question about why she had come back. Though the obvious answer hung between them it was still unresolved. She had been working under the assumption that Alice had to be upset about the events of her birthday. She figured that this was why she had received nothing but that note as a goodbye. Now that she thought about it anger flared in her belly at the memory of how Alice left. It was slightly irrational given the situation but it was there nonetheless. Now the real question she asked herself was, why didn't she feel that familiar overwhelming ache when she thought of Edward? It must be because his sister, who was so similar to him in many aspects, was near. Maybe it was filling that gap that he had left or perhaps it was just going to be a delayed reaction and she would feel the full force of later. Her roller coaster ride with Edward had left her with no way go gauge how she should be feeling.

The door opened and Alice's wet head appeared followed by her graceful body that glowed clean in the soft light. The clothes were slightly loose as Alice was just a little smaller than Bella but they fit pretty well. Bella's breath caught hotly in her throat. She had forgotten how beautiful Alice was. It hit her like a jet powered train. How could she have let the memories get so frayed and fuzzy. The small angular face was perfectly shaped and the flow of her torso to her legs was perfect symmetry. She seemed unearthly under a human gaze.

Alice watched Bella's eyes roam her body and felt particularly lucky to have that gaze raking her from head to toe whatever the intention behind it was. She would be happy with anything at this point. She came to rest at the end of the bed, sliding closer to Bella and placed her hands neatly in her lap. She was once again waiting for Bella to speak.

Bella finally cleared her throat and found that her brain was still actually functioning even if its rate was rather slow.

"So, I guess we should talk about this."

Alice was confused as to what Bella was referring to after she had been blasted with that hot gaze but she caught on quickly and held up a hand to stop her. "I think we should wait for the morning. You look tired."

Bella had not really been paying attention to what her body was saying to her beyond her basic reactions to Alice. She had been so happy to wake up to find Alice in her room that the sluggish state of her limbs had not registered with her. She grimaced at the thought of sleeping but didn't see how she could avoid it. She had a condition though.

"You promise you won't leave?"

Her eyes burned into Alice's daring her to refuse. She watched as Alice placed a hand over her heart.

"I promise that I will not leave this room until you tell me to."

She punctuated her promise with a wink and started to go back to her spot on the floor. Bella stopped her with a hand.

"What are you doing?"

The question seemed to confuse Alice. "I was just going to sit on the floor while you slept." Bella pulled her hand back but her eyes kept Alice where she was hovering between the bed and the floor.

"Alice, you can stay on the bed," she paused, "Unless you don't want to. I mean I understand..."

Alice readjusted so that she was sitting on the bed again. "No, I'd like that. I just thought it might be uncomfortable for you with the temperature difference and all."

"Actually, its comforting," Bella said as she settled back into the bed pulled herself under the covers. Alice followed her laying on the outside of the covers with her arms over her head. She fought the urge to reach out towards the human warmth and placed her hands behind her head and pressed down.

Bella watched her companion settle into her position and rolled to the side facing Alice. She placed one hand under her head and the other between her knees. She wanted to seek comfort in Alice but fear stopped her fingers from what they wanted. She could feel the coolness coming off of the vampire's skin and she supposed that would be enough for her to sleep. She didn't want to make her friend uncomfortable and the thought of Alice moving any farther away as a result of her need was too much so she stayed where she was until she fell into a unfulfilled sleep that racked her body with jerky movement.

Fifteen minutes later Alice was grinning like a fool as she luxuriated in the feel of Bella's arms grasping her from the side. In sleep Bella's body had found what it needed. Her head rested on Alice's chest and her arm was slung across the petite body under her. Alice had wrapped her arms around Bella cautiously at first afraid of waking her but when Bella had snuggled closer she had given in and placed her arms where she had wanted them all along. They were perfectly snug together. Alice's hand gently stroked Bella's back where her shirt had risen and in the front she had gently tugged the edge of the t shirt she was wearing out of the way so that she could feel Bella's skin against her own there. The covers had been pushed down to just below Bella's waist. Alice could not bring herself to feel bad about wanting to feel this. It was natural she told herself, even if she was setting herself up for a fall later. At least she would have this singular experience.

Then suddenly she felt guilt wash her like paint. She was here enjoying stolen comfort in Bella's arms while she had left Jasper far away in the frozen mountains. It was not as if she hadn't thought of this before but she had not allowed herself to explore the concept. Her brave, ever loyal soldier was waiting for her with the rest of her family minus Edward while she lay here enjoying the warmth of the girl that her brother was in love with. She was betraying so many, including the girl that slept with her now. In a way she felt like she was lying to Bella by being here with her and feeling what she was feeling. She forced her mind to slow down and breathed deeply until she found a slow, dead feeling descend on her. Once again she would worry about it later.


	4. Mare Australe

The process of moving had delayed an update but here you go! This next chapter is a bit shorter but its because the next ones are going to get into some heavy plot unfolding.

**Roonie**, thanks for reading and reviewing. I love Latin and the way it rolls off the tongue. I am glad you approve. I am pretty picky about my fanfiction and I agree with you. I have not found an large amount of Bella/Alice that I like all that much. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

**Seri85**, I am so glad that the last chapter had more of what you were looking for and I hope this one delivers as well. Thank you for the compliment to my writing. I assure you I blushed a little.

**Avada Cantare**, no worries I am well aquainted with brain fuzziness! It is about four in the morning now and I will be happy if I make it to my bedroom in one piece. I am so glad you like the chapter titles. It was just a little something I put in there to make myself happy. I have always had a facination with the moon and its geology. Jane Austen has been my favorite novelist since I was a teenager. I think I have about three copies of each of her novels. I just can't seem to stop collecting. Marrianne's story in Sense and Sensibility always stuck me and I always thought that SMeyers' full name for Alice was a shout out to that novel. Mary Alice Brandon.... the character in S&S is called Marianne Brandon after she marries Colonel Brandon at the end of the novel. Even if that is a bit of fantasy in my head I think it is approperate for this story as Marrianne was quite desolate after she got shoved off by that wanker Willoughby.

Sorry for the length here.... on with the show

* * *

Bella's life had always been going somewhere extraordinary and she was blissfully unaware of the fact. She was in no way sure of herself and like most beings on earth she had no idea who she was but today she slept in quiet peace away from the turbulence of the last few months. There were no thoughts of suffering or happiness. She was simply being herself even in sleep. She could not know that there were limbs everywhere. Wrapping, bending, feeling, holding each other away from the light, but Alice was fully aware of their state of entanglement. Bella woke to diamonds in her eyes. The world in its enigmatic nature had blessed Forks with two straight days of seeing the sun. The clouds that were still in attendance had retreated back to a respectful distance making the full beauty of vampire skin possible to witness. Today the striking nature of the creature before her would be rejoiced in even by the sky. She knew Alice was awake but the vampire didn't move as Bella's eyes roamed her face. The eyes were closed and her soul rose forth from her petite frame to magnify the way being near Bella made her feel again. Bella's hand reached out to feel the hair that was so near her. She felt the way the edges blended against her fingertips and rubbed a few strands together. The texture was amazing and real. She felt the air release from her chest and make its way out of her body and saw the spiky hair flutter as her own carbon dioxide flew through it.

Alice smiled and Bella's attention was drawn once again to the glowing crystal of her face. The facets of the sparkling paleness changed as she moved slowly to face her companion. Now Alice was relaxed and it felt delicious after such a long time away. She stretched like a cat even though she had no need of the act. It felt natural to do so. She watched an answering smile light Bella's face.

"Good morning," she cooed.

The spoken words surprised Bella and she had once again forgotten the ring of Alice's voice in the night.

"Morning... did you rest well," she asked?

Even if Alice did not sleep she partook in some sort of rest Bella imagined.

"It was nice," Alice thought wonderful was a more descriptive word but she held back, "I had a moment of concern when Charlie went to work but he didn't even check on you."

Bella's face fell into concern. The fantastic manner of her waking had left her oblivious to the real complications that awaited them. She was suddenly aware of her body and what it was currently doing. She looked down to see her legs flung into a chaotic tangle with Alice's and her cheek was currently resting near Alice's chest. It had felt like the most natural thing in the world until she had become aware of it. She lifted her body backwards toward the edge of the bed and pulled her legs free. Now she was standing to the side of the bed looking down on Alice. She felt even more awkward. Her arms flew across her body as if they could protect her from her own feelings. She desperately reached for any kind of logical thing to say to return the situation back to normal. Alice's patient, pleasant expression had not altered. She beamed up at Bella as if nothing was amiss. Bella blinked rapidly thoughts coming and going in seconds.

"Charlie," she finally managed, "what are we going to do about that..."

She had run out of steam when Alice's smile had widened. The effect of even more light being deflected was heart stopping.

"Well, since I had a lot of time to think while you were sleeping," she looked at the place Bella had vacated on the bed with fondness, "I came up with a story."

Bella sat back on the bed, put at ease that at least someone had the brain capacity to come up with a plan. She motioned for Alice to continue.

"I thought I would just hang out until Charlie comes home and when he does we can just tell him that I am visiting for awhile."

Bella nodded but still had her doubts. "But what are we going to tell him when he asks why you are visiting?"

Alice shook her head slowly as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"I have to visit my best friend in the world on my only break before college, don't I?"

Why hadn't she thought of such a simple answer. Though, it was hard for her to think when she was suffering from the combination of tiredness and having a vampire in her bed. Bella gave one of her exhale scoffs and smiled at her own lack of thought processes in the presence of this family. She noticed that the clock by her bed was displaying a much later hour than she expected. It was almost five. She had slept through an entire day. She deeply regretted the loss of time.

* * *

Charlie slammed the door to his cruiser a little harder than he normally would. He had experienced a less than stellar day at the police station. The district commander of eighth district of the State Patrol had come all the way from Bremerton to lean on him about the rash of murders that were happening throughout the area. It looked as if whoever had been killing folks around the surrounding counties in animalistic way was back at it. When this killer had last struck it had taken someone he had called a friend. He squeezed his eyes until he was sure the sight of Waylan's blood drained corpse was pushed into its rightful place in the back of his mind. He stepped up to the porch and opened the door. The first thing that hit him was the smell of cooking, the second thing was the high lilting voice of Alice Cullen. He moved right into the kitchen without taking off his utility belt as he usually did. His first thought was that if Edward had returned he would skin him alive.

Bella whirled around when she heard his booted footfalls. Alice had warned her that he was approaching but in the interest of acting natural they had carried on as if they didn't know he was home. He glared at Alice. His day was getting weirder. Bella immediately came forward, spatula in hand.

"Dad, I'm glad you're home," she said.

She moved between her father and Alice who was sitting at the table. She could feel the tension vibrating off of him as she looked up nervously.

"Alice?"

His question was obvious. She stood and approached him with grace, placing a hand on Bella's shoulder. She smiled at her friend and held her hand out to Charlie. He looked down doubtfully but finally reached out his own much larger hand to engulf hers. Their handshake was slow and tight.

"Nice to see you Charlie," she paused looking him in the eye and wasted no time in answering his unspoken question, "I finished school early due to my accelerated courses and I thought I would come visit Bella... and you of course."

She smiled warmly at him and he relaxed. He let go of her hand and looked from Alice to his daughter.

"You're here alone," he questioned, his tone implying that he had no interest in seeing certain members of her family in his home.

"Yes, the rest of the family is off on a trip of their own. They went to climb Mount McKinley. Our house isn't far from there but climbing mountains is just not my thing so I thought I would come get away from the cold for a bit."

Her natural ease at lying was so prominent that even Bella almost believed her for a moment. Charlie looked at his daughter closely. She seemed to be fine with Alice being back. In fact, she seemed much more animated than when he had last seen her. There was some color back in her face and though she was still painfully thin she looked more alive.

"Hmm, welcome back Alice," he grumbled.

She waved cheerily and returned her seat at the kitchen table. He shuffled back to the entry way to relieve himself of his belt and gun. He pulled the gun from its holster and placed it in the small drawer in the hall table. There was no way he was done questioning Alice. He was not going to let her just skate back into Bella's life without knowing that she was not going to harm his daughter even more than she already had. He was not a stupid man. He knew that Alice's departure had hit her pretty hard. He had been the one standing at Bella's door at three in the morning listening to the tears fall.

Bella was back over the stove the moment that Charlie had left to change. She was relieved that it had gone so well but still afraid that he was going to ask some tough questions when he came back downstairs. Alice grinned at her from the table. It was very unsettling to see her friend still so at ease when she was sweating like a pig, but this was what happened when one fraternized with vampires. She wondered how Alice was going to wiggle her way into staying. That is, if she was going to stay. The realization hit her that Alice could just take off again or at least not stay in the same house with her. That was enough to send her stomach plummeting. She turned, determined to elicit a promise from Alice when Charlie reentered, clad in his usual flannel and jeans. He was straight and to the point.

"Alice, how long do you intend on staying?"

She casually turned toward him.

"Well, I thought at least a week if that's okay with you."

He looked back and forth from Bella to Alice. It was quite an awkward situation for him. Even though he was afraid of what Alice being here might mean he understood by just looking at Bella that she was already feeling better. He decided to give Alice a chance. She was always his favorite Cullen anyway, even if she was just as mysterious as the rest of them. She had a way about her that charmed him.

"If you're staying here I guess I should get the extra blankets out so you can use the couch."

"Dad," Bella shot from across the kitchen. "She can stay with me in my room."

She was so relieved that it seemed as if Alice would be around at least for a little while that she had no qualms about speaking up. She didn't notice that Alice's face lit up with her words. Charlie put his hands on his hips and considered the possibility.

"That's fine," was all he said. He would definitely be keeping his eyes on Alice but for now he would settle into his favorite chair in front of the flat screen and wait for what looked like a good dinner.

Alice was shining like a new penny. She erased her doubts about staying for the moment and returned to watching Bella cook. It was the only thing that made Bella appear physically graceful. When she forgot that she could trip over herself she turned into quite an accomplished cook. She had bought herself a week to be with Bella and she would not let it pass without cataloging every moment in her mind. There would be a mark on her memory for every smile and movement that was bestowed on her, and there would be no wasting these days.

Bella pushed the chicken she was frying around to new positions in the pan and basked in the feeling of being watched. As long as Alice's gaze was on her she was assured of the continuation of her heart to beat. She felt the blood pump strong for the first time in ages. The warm liquid feeling of it pooled in her gut making her a bit dizzy. She turned knowing she had to meet the eyes she felt were there. When she did her mind exploded with possibilities that she had never before considered. Now that her eyes had met their burnt amber matches she shifted to the lips that curved in an appealing manner. Their fullness was amazing. What was she going to do with thoughts such as these?


	5. Mare Cognitum

**A/N: Finally!!!! I am sorry. I had a bit of a crisis and had to move suddenly. I am now back online and actually have better access than I did before. Here is number five. Thanks for all the feedback and I hope you enjoy this one. Thanks to Bat for Lashes for the inspiration. **

* * *

Days passed without incident and all three occupants of the Swan house fell into an easy routine. Bella begged Alice to extend her stay and Charlie watched the girls interact with pleasure. Now that Bella was better he felt the pressure lift off his shoulders. He had not realized how much her despair and affected his own mood, but now there was something else in the air that he could not put his finger on. It did not worry him per se; it just made his sixth sense twitch. He did not dwell on it because he just needed everything to keep being okay. He still had his nagging doubt about Alice's return and what it might mean when she left after the week was over. For now he was content to watch his game and listen to the gentle sound of the girls' exchange in the kitchen. Dinner was almost ready and then he hoped to get into bed a little early. He yawned and turned to look into the kitchen. Alice's laugh had drawn his attention away from his flat screen. He watched Bella turn back to the stove. Then he saw Alice watching her. He could only see her profile but even with that limited view he could see the fond manner in which Alice gazed at his daughter. His extra sense twanged again and he quickly turned back to the screen right before Alice's head turned in his direction. Her brow crinkled. She could almost hear Charlie's brain working.

Grey skies stared down at Bella making her blink at the sun's light that was reflected in the steel shroud above her. Then she was suddenly turned upside down as if she was connected to a wire. The motions of her body jerked with such force that she vomited. She watched the contents of her stomach fall away from her body but oddly they disappeared from view too soon. It looked like they had slipped into some invisible portal between the sky and the ground. This was when she realized that she was suspended in the air above the leaf covered forest floor. Whatever was holding her slipped and she fell toward the ground only to stop just before her face hit the dirt. She had turned her face, anticipating the impact so her vision was obscured by her hair that had fallen around her. She felt cold hands pull back her hair and caress her cheeks. They were small hands, smaller than she was accustomed to but they felt good. She let them roam her face and she then she was lying on the ground though she had felt no movement. The wire had let her go. The clouds once again greeted her but the brightness was still there. Those hands were now on her neck making pain from the movement recede into the background. She could not see the face that the hands belonged to. The features of her benefactor were obscured by the light. She could do nothing but lay and feel the healing power of these hands.

Alice stared into Bella's face wondering what was causing her friend to move in such an abrupt manner. She held her hands just above Bella trying to decide if she should wake her. She seemed disturbed and it could only be a dream or a nightmare. Alice did not remember ever having one but this is what she figured they looked like. She gave up on hesitation and placed her hands on the pale face under her. Now Bella seemed to calm. She was fighting with the urge to let her hands roam and steal even more of the human warmth that Bella emitted. She closed her eyes and breathed in the scent. The combination of touch and smell was fantastic and she slowly lowered her upper body to get closer to these sensations. Her face was just above Bella's neck when she felt movement against her hands. The whisper of eyelashes opening made her eyes snap open. She stared down at the girl she wanted more than life and hoped that she would not have an adverse reaction to what Alice could not stop herself from doing.

Bella forced herself out of one dream only to find herself in another one. Alice was pressed against her body and her hands were on her face and neck just as it had been in her dream and now she saw the eyes full of shock and fear. No words were spoken and the air became crisp with anticipation. Bella sought no council from her mind but did as her instincts told her. Her hands moved from their sleeping positions to cover Alice's. The cold of vampire skin cut through her warmth bringing back the feeling of dry winter. She watched the liquid topaz starting into her eyes loose some of the fear and gain wonder in its place. She moved the right hand below her own onto her chest where her heart beat had begun to pick up. The fabric between the hand and her chest became a hindrance so she reached down and pulled it aside. She gasped as the fabric tore away and was replaced with cold skin. She felt the echo of her heart's rhythm in her ears.

Moving again on instinct she reached up and through the foot of space separating them, placing her hand on Alice's face. Her body was yelling at her from top to bottom, but she did not want to break the spell by moving too fast. She pulled the face closer and closer, redirecting it to meet her own. Her breath came shallow and her mind was spiraling down until she felt her eyes flutter closed. Then cold lips to match the hands came crashing down on her warmth and she was kissing Alice. Her hands found the luscious hair and there was no more world. She was grasped by the enormity of what was happening but could only speak in the language of the experience. They talked with touch and dreams. Now she understood the feelings she had been having.

Alice would not let herself hurt Bella but it was becoming increasingly hard to touch her without crushing force. There was almost a moment when she was lost to the passion but the will that she had cultivated snapped back at her. She stopped the kiss slowly, wanting it to last as long as possible. What had started as a fierce exchange ended in a tender gaze from girl to vampire. Alice never thought that she would see her feelings fulfilled. Even if this was all she would receive in exchange for her love she would remember it always. Bella's face turned away from her.

"I'm sorry," Alice murmured, "I don't know what came over me."

Bella did not turn back to face her. There was no reason for Alice to be sorry but Bella could not speak. There was no turning back from the bubble that they had burst. There had been sheen to their interaction for the past few days and the building tension had finally exploded. The heated gazes from each when they felt no one looking had layered until they were no longer one at a time. They finally merged in the meeting of eyes and the merging of thoughts. Even if it was not on a conscious level they both knew what they wanted. Thoughts of brothers and lovers were now distractions and pushed away. Until it came crashing like the sea around them after a dream. Now that the tension was broken she felt guilt, but when that emotion dawned in her she forced herself to look back at Alice. He had left her she should feel no guilt for moving past what they tenuously built. Her body was now clear of the marks he had left on her. Alice's touch had erased them and tattooed her mind and body with wonderful patterns. She embraced the restorative powers that the kiss had given to her psyche and heart. Now she wanted more.

"I'm not sorry," Bella's hoarse voice broke.

Alice dipped her head accepting the statement but her worries were not squelched.

"Are you okay?"

Bella's mouth crooked in an offhand smile. "For the first time in forever… I think I am. Thank you."

She felt insulated in this world that they had created and here she was brave. The silkiness of Alice's voice had just added more fuel to her needs. Now she pressed forward and went in for another swim in the sea, this time she was anchored steadily by Alice's body.


	6. Mare Insularum

Chapter 6: Mare Insularum (Sea of Islands)

A virus, a move, two jobs and much writer's block angst later here is the next chapter. I apologize for the length of time it took. This is what happened after the fateful night and a glimpse of that other guy. ;-) Thanks for reading and reviewing. I hope to hear more in the future.

* * *

The dark broke into day and the amorous actions of the night were hovering in memories of the near past. For a girl and her vampire it had been a glorious revelry in lips and touches and later Bella had slept enfolded in Alice's body, fully relaxed for the first time in quite awhile.

The tastes were exotic and new but the passion had always been there under another name. At the moment entwined hands splayed on the pillow behind Bella's head, one unnaturally perfect and one perfectly human and amber eyes gazed lazily at closed lids.

Alice nuzzled into the pale neck unconsciously offered her in the hopes of seeing the brown irises beneath. She was quite successful because the lids shot open. The sigh that followed sounded the call of a tension that had not completely snapped yet.

"Alice?" Bella leaned into the cold skin, shivering from something different altogether.

"Yes," the answering whisper confirmed.

"Good," Bella nodded and moved her hand from Alice's to her own face, "I was afraid it wasn't real… again"

"No, it is quite definitely real. I am here."

"I'm glad you're here." Bella said.

An idea grabbed Alice that set her brow with fear. "Are you okay? I would hate for you to regret…"

Bella rose so that she could look into Alice's face. "I don't regret it," she struggled, "I just don't know…well… what…I've never." She couldn't find the words now that the heat of the action had ceased.

"It's okay," Alice replied trailing fingers over Bella's face.

Silenced and calmed by the action Bella got a grip. "What does it mean?" It was something she wasn't sure she was ready to address but the question had flown out of her before she could stop it.

Alice squared her shoulders determined to get her side of the explanation right. She feared scaring Bella, who she supposed had never embarked on something like this before, at least not with someone of the female variety.

Obviously, Bella had done something similar with a vampire before. She didn't want to dwell too long on that because she was still irrationally angry with Edward. It was something she would get over in time.

"Bella, I have to tell you this because I need you to know what you're getting into. I've had feelings for you for quite some time," she paused when Bella looked perplexed, "Obviously; it was never a good idea to reveal them to you for so many reasons."

It was too late to take it back now even if she had wanted to but it was obvious that she had been correct in her assumption that Bella had never considered anything of the kind.

Bella bit her bottom lip as she considered the revelation. She had never known of Alice's feelings and was confident that she would have never found out if circumstances had not been laid out as they now were.

Alice Cullen had feelings for her. How did she feel about that? She had always thought of Alice as this unattainable being, even more so than Edward. The fact that this was happening, that this beautiful creature wanted to be more than her friend was beyond the boundary she had built between them in her mind.

Alice had always held her attention but it was as if they were both shy and bold with each other. Their friendship had been struck instantly because beyond the physical they fit together with no hard edges. Their personalities seemed to wrap around each other like supportive arms.

They had always been united in the fact that Edward was special to both of them, but now there was something further to consider beyond that. If they had met independently of Edward would their relationship be different? Now, that led Bella right back into the other parties involved in their lives.

"Jasper," Bella asked?

Alice unconsciously placed a hand on over her chest. She exhaled forcefully showing that human emotions were still quite a catch for the superhuman.

"He knows… something," her eyes lowered, "You see, Jasper and I have always had this fateful relationship so I never considered what would happen if I ever really had feelings for someone else. We both know that we might be attracted to others since it is in our nature as it is in yours. I like to think that it's human part of us that makes love and attraction possible."

She paused for a moment wanting to answer satisfactorily for herself as much as for Bella and because this next bit was tricky.

"What I was not prepared for were feelings deeper than mere attraction or infatuation directed at someone else and to actually answer your question... I have no idea"

Now it was complicated and they were obviously in over their heads at the moment. She did not want whatever was happening to wreck Alice and Jasper's marriage, however unconventional it was, but there was something to this that warranted further exploration. The door was opened and it was only a matter of feeling their way forward if they chose to.

"What are we going to do?"

"Well, I know what I would like to do," Alice's mischievous tone was almost instantly culled by the seriousness of Bella's expression. "Instead, I think we should return to how you feel about the situation."

Bella felt strangely calm. She should be freaking out, but it was as if part of her expected and was just waiting for this to happen. Still, that did not deter her from considering the possibility that her experience with Alice could be a flash in the pan because of Edward.

Edward and his sister were similar, but it didn't feel the same. On the contrary, Alice made her feel alive and new. Even in this incredibly early stage it felt like something that had just fallen together, unlike the difficulties that had surrounded her feelings for Edward.

She was no longer that wet and sodden being on the forest floor. Alice had brought her up from the hole she had been falling into and back home to the warmth. Jake had helped her start the process but Alice seemed to be finishing it.

Alice could no longer take the silence so she reached out tapping Bella on the nose. Bella looked into those amber eyes trying to find the secret to their predicament in their ageless depths. All she saw was something she couldn't quantify. She wondered what her own eyes were showing the vampire. She could tell that Alice was reading her like text.

It was in that moment that Bella just decided to let it fly. She was jumping off a cliff again but this time she was jumping into her rescuer's arms. Giving in to the feelings just felt good and maybe by experiencing them she would find her way. After all, Edward was no longer a factor and at least Jasper knew something was up. Maybe things weren't so bleak after all.

"I don't want to worry about it right now," she finally said, "You just got back and I want to feel good about that. Alice, can't we please just be happy for awhile?"

That request was something that the vampire was more than happy to comply with. "For today," Alice replied, "But we need to talk more soon."

Bella felt confident that she might be able to persuade Alice otherwise but for now she would seal the agreement with a kiss. Just before their lips met a thought ran across her mind. She put it aside, instead feeling the pleasure of cool lips on her own.

They parted and Bella's brain took up just where it had left off, like a tape that had been paused. Kissing Alice left everything suspended for a moment. It was like gravity lifted for them every time they embraced.

"How can you do this Alice?" She pulled back so that she could see Alice full in the face. "What do you mean?" Alice was suddenly worried that Bella was experiencing a change of heart.

"Well, Edward could barely touch me without hunger taking over."

Alice's lips formed a line and her brow creased even though she was relieved. This was something she had not considered in the heat of the moment. There were many things that she had simply not though to question. This was not smart of her, but Bella obviously affected her good sense.

Ever since she had seen Bella jump off the cliff and into the water things had felt different. The shift in the point of view in her vision had something to do with it but she couldn't figure it out. She thought it was best not to mention it when she had no idea how it fit into the issue herself.

"I guess I was just so happy that you were alive that I was not really thinking about killing you," Alice murmured. "Now that you say that though, I am feeling a bit peckish and your scent isn't helping. I can hear your blood so clearly."

Alice's voice betrayed her complete wonderment. She had never expected to be this close to Bella in the way that she was now. She could sense everything even more clearly than she could before. She felt they had merged in some way beyond normal means.

Bella choked out a laugh. The way in which Alice had said that last bit so nonchalantly was both adorable and slightly garish. After all, How does one reply to such a statement?

* * *

Far away on a desolate plain in South America Edward was wasting away in his eternal body. His decision was driving him mad and his inability to attain the one goal that he had set further worsened his condition. His fingers touched the dry, cracked ground as he allowed himself to collapse.

His knees buckled and he met the dirt with a welcoming mind. If oblivion were possible he would dive into it with pleasure. He vaguely hoped that Victoria would find him here and rip him to shreds. He knew that she was far away. The scent she had left behind was so faint he could barely detect it.

He would rest here for the moment but knew that if he was idle for too long that he would look back. If he allowed that it was only a matter of time until he would return to Forks. He would tell himself that it was just to make sure that Bella was alright but he would know deep down that he would return to her in the end. He could not help putting her in danger.


End file.
